Sunday, 28 December 2014

Plans for 2015?

I have been asked this question a few times in the last period. Had no answer, whatsoever.
The first time, it took me by surprise, I said I need to think about it.
Been busy. Focused on other things. Forgot. No big deal.
The second time I said:
Well, my life is going pretty well, I wouldn't mind if it keeps going like this.
But soon that I hear that out loud, I realised it was not true.
I want a change for the new year. I need it, I will work for it, I'll have it!
What kind of change?
Hmm, … just... a TOTAL one! :D

I want to fall in love with the right person. I want to feel emotions long time forgotten. I want to love completely and to be loved in the same way. I want to belong to someone and feel that someone belongs to me. Only to me.
My heart, my body, craves for passion; intense, clean and true desire.
No more hiding, no more running away, no more fear, no more tears, no more expectations and endless disappointments, no more frustration and humiliation, no more trusting people I should have never trust. No more drinking litres of Vodka, alone in my cluttered room, just to fall asleep... 

What's new, different than everything else?!

Not much, true. Maybe it's time for me to act like an adult and not like a spoiled child.
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I've never been spoiled; I don't even remember being a child, to be honest.
Kidding, of course.
I guess I was born a child, but long, long, long time ago. :D Hmmm. Need to ask my parents about this. Just to make sure. Don't want to say stupid things to people who have faith in me.
-------
Seriously now, I want a love story as pictured in the Hollywood movies (not Bollywood, no. Those are overly unrealistic) and fairy tales.
Is not that I am asking TOO much, is it?!
What are you talking about (you'll think), Of course not!!! Entirely reasonable quest....
Only if you'd live on a different planet (or a parallel universe), with different human beings. Maybe green ones, who make love by touching their fingers (how weird and sad is that?!). :D
Ups, what a cynic I am. Shame on me!
But is this cynicism or just pure and cruel realism?!!!
Let's face it, folks, love is not eternal.
No, no, no, stop crying, please. I didn't know you still believed!!! Sorry. :D

It does not matter how real and endless it feels at the beginning, one day; we'll wake up next to some body (no mistake in here) and feel completely and utterly alone. Shivering, we'll look around, searching for the duvet, (which we won't find) hoping it's a nightmare, but soon we'll hear “the body” snoring (like a Guinea pig) and we'll have no choice than to accept the genuine truth:
Love sucks, guys! Grow up and move on!

I wish you to have whatever you want in the year to come.

Ps. 1 Honestly speaking, deep down in my heart, I wish to be wrong and live an intense love story.  For a while at least. In the daylight.
Ps 2. I don't drink Vodka. No, it makes me feel sick. I am a whisky person. :D

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See you soon, amazing human being.


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